Am I Affected by Childhood Trauma? A Personal Checklist

For those who grew up in a dysfunctional family, past experiences can deeply affect adult life, often in ways that remain unnoticed or are minimized. 

Children who served as a family scapegoat, or who endured childhood trauma, may develop coping mechanisms that hide the underlying impact of these experiences. Over time, unresolved trauma can affect mental health, relationships, and self-perception in subtle yet powerful ways. 

This checklist is designed to help identify if the effects of a difficult past are still present, allowing for a greater awareness and, potentially, a path to healing.

*Disclaimer

This checklist is designed for personal reflection and is not intended as a substitute for professional guidance. The questions are based on personal experiences and may help you identify potential patterns. Self-awareness is important, but it's crucial to seek professional support for accurate assessment and treatment. 

This website does not provide medical or psychological advice, and we are not responsible for any interpretations or actions taken based on the results of this checklist.

Section 1: Emotional Health and Stability

1. Do you often feel “emotionally numb” or struggle to connect with your feelings?

2. Have you experienced prolonged periods of sadness, anxiety, or depression without a clear cause?

3. Do you frequently feel unworthy, inadequate, or undeserving of good things in life?

4. Are you prone to feeling guilt or shame, even when you haven’t done anything wrong?

5. Do you often feel responsible for the emotional well-being of others, even when it affects your own?

6. Have you noticed that you sometimes doubt your own perceptions or memories?

7. Do you avoid situations that might trigger strong emotions, preferring to stay “safe” in emotional neutrality?

8. Are you uncomfortable with self-compassion, finding it hard to forgive yourself for past mistakes?

9. Do you feel “stuck” emotionally, like you’re carrying a heavy, invisible weight?

10. Are you easily overwhelmed by criticism or rejection, even in minor situations?

Section 2: Relationships and Boundaries

1. Do you find it hard to trust others, even those close to you?

2. Are you prone to “people-pleasing” behaviors, feeling compelled to make others happy at your own expense?

3. Have you noticed a pattern of attracting toxic or controlling people into your life?

4. Do you struggle to set boundaries, feeling guilty or afraid when you try to say “no”?

5. Are you easily drawn into relationships where you feel undervalued or taken advantage of?

6. Have you avoided intimacy in relationships out of fear of being hurt or abandoned?

7. Do you find yourself “walking on eggshells” in certain relationships, fearing conflict or disapproval?

8. Do you have a hard time asking for help or expressing your needs to others?

9. Are you prone to sudden anger or frustration, especially in close relationships?

10. Do you find yourself constantly questioning if people really like or care about you?

Section 3: Self-Perception and Self-Worth

1. Do you frequently engage in negative self-talk or self-criticism?

2. Are you excessively hard on yourself, often feeling that you “don’t measure up”?

3. Do you have difficulty identifying your strengths, talents, or positive qualities?

4. Do you feel like you’re an “imposter,” even when you’re successful or praised?

5. Are you more comfortable focusing on others’ needs and successes than on your own?

6. Do you avoid taking risks or trying new things due to a fear of failure?

7. Are you easily discouraged by setbacks, feeling as though they confirm your inadequacy?

8. Do you struggle to celebrate your achievements, feeling they aren’t “good enough”?

9. Have you noticed a tendency to view yourself as a “victim” or feel stuck in past roles?

10. Do you find it hard to believe that you are lovable or deserving of happiness?

Section 4: Coping Mechanisms and Habits

1. Do you frequently use distractions (e.g., work, TV, social media) to avoid thinking about your past?

2. Have you developed habits or behaviors that numb your feelings, like overeating, drinking, or overspending?

3. Are you prone to procrastination, feeling paralyzed by overwhelming emotions?

4. Do you find it hard to maintain routines or self-care practices consistently?

5. Have you experienced burnout or exhaustion, even from activities you once enjoyed?

6. Do you find it difficult to relax, feeling like you always need to be “doing something”?

7. Have you engaged in self-sabotaging behaviors, such as quitting projects or jobs just as they’re succeeding?

8. Are you prone to obsessive thinking or replaying negative memories?

9. Do you experience sudden outbursts of anger or frustration that feel “out of character”?

10. Have you noticed a tendency to avoid facing difficult emotions or conversations?

Section 5: Awareness and Healing Readiness

1. Do you often avoid thinking about your childhood, feeling it’s “in the past” and irrelevant?

2. Have you ever brushed off traumatic experiences, thinking “others had it worse”?

3. Do you struggle with identifying specific events or memories from childhood, as though they’re “blurred”?

4. Are you uncomfortable talking about your family or childhood with others?

5. Do you feel resistance toward therapy, self-reflection, or other forms of healing?

6. Have you avoided making significant changes, fearing it could “open up old wounds”?

7. Do you feel that facing your past would somehow be “disloyal” or unfair to your family?

8. Have you noticed a tendency to minimize or rationalize toxic behavior you experienced growing up?

9. Are you inclined to view yourself as fully “healed” without actually exploring your past in depth?

10. Do you feel that emotional healing is unnecessary or impossible for you?

Scoring System

- Over 60 "Yes" Responses: Strong indication of unaddressed trauma impacting various aspects of life. Seeking professional guidance or therapy could be particularly beneficial.

- 30-59 "Yes" Responses: Moderate indication, suggesting that past experiences have affected you, though these may be manageable with support or self-reflection.

- Fewer than 30 "Yes" Responses: Limited indication, though some elements of your past may still be worth exploring to support personal growth and healing.

Conclusion

Completing this checklist may help highlight the lingering effects of past trauma or dysfunctional family experiences that you may not have been fully aware of. 

This awareness may serve as a guide to consider reaching out for professional support, focusing on self-care practices, or beginning a personal journey toward healing.

If you found this checklist useful, check out our full collection of resources. Share these with friends and family to spread awareness and help others recognize important signs.

You might also enjoy exploring our “Resilient Soul Collection” of products which is specially designed for those who have experienced family scapegoating, grown up in dysfunctional families, dealt with narcissistic parenting, or are childhood trauma survivors.